Killing Me Softly

This is my version of ‘Killing Me Softly’ by Roberta Flack/The Fugees, inspired by M, who last night, in the bath, blatantly ignored my request not to fill up the jug from the tap. He did it once and I explained calmly that the water can suddenly get too hot because it’s a mixer tap and I didn’t want him to burn himself.  I should have saved my breath because he did it again straight away as though I’d not even spoken.

I told him slightly less calmly to do as he was told (he’d been testing my patience all day despite doing lots of fun things) or he’d go straight to bed.  It fell on deaf ears because as soon as I left the room to get their cups to fill with fresh water he did it again.  I had no choice but to follow through with my threat and you could say he was very vocal about his displeasure:

Assaulting my ears with his screaming

Making me drink wine with his words

Killing me softly with his cries

Killing me softly with his cries

Deafening the neighbours with banging

Killing me softly with his cries

 

(Hi, yo yea yea.
This is Distressed Housewife
With my little shit, M.  Drinking wine up in here…
Go to sleep, little M
While I’m on this I got my girl DH One time! One time!
Hey yo DH you know you got the lyrics!)

 

I heard him ask to come down

I heard him ask again

And so I chose to ignore him

And listened to his wails

And there he was this young boy

Bright crimson with pure rage

 

Waking the street with his screeching

Repeating himself til he’s hoarse

Killing me softly, not stopping

Killing me softly, not stopping

Ruining his own fun with his words

Killing me softly because he can

 

I felt all flushed with anger

Determined not to break

I felt he’d found my weakness

And played it like a pro

I prayed that he would finish

But he just kept right on

 

Wanting his way regardless (ten times)

Not wanting to go to bed (ten times)

Killing me softly with his screams

Killing me softly with his screams

Shortening my patience with his words

Killing me softly with his screams

 

(Instrumental wailing)

 

He repeated the same request

Despite my dark despair

He kept saying it over and over

As if I wasn’t there

And then he kept on screaming

Screaming clear and strong

 

Driving me crazy with repetition

Slugging back wine at his words

Killing me softly with his whines

Killing me softly with his whines

Wanting to send me over the edge

Killing me softly because he’s four

 

Wanting to hide under the duvet

Wanting to turn up the TV

Wanting to drown out his screaming

Wanting to drown out his screaming

Wishing he’d go to sleep and stop moaning

Wishing he’d sleep

 

Trying to think what we’d done wrong

Wishing we could reason with him

Trying to think how to solve it

Trying to think how to solve it

But it’s how he gets his kicks

By killing me softly…

 

Post Comment Love
Share

4 Comments

  1. My life will never be the same again. every day I have about 50 “why the heck do I bother even saying it?” moments, and now every one will be punctuated by that song…. 😀

  2. Sheer brilliance! This made me crack up – especially when you called him a little shit! Hilarious. Thank you for linking to PoCoLo x

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published.


*


%d bloggers like this: