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The Waltons

The Waltons

Distressed Housewife / November 5, 2012

Something very strange has been happening over the last ten hours or so and if I didn’t know any better, I’d think it was still Halloween instead of Guy Fawkes Night.

Today, Matthew, my family is…The Waltons.

This morning I did the school and nursery runs WITHOUT ANY ARGUMENTS OR SHOUTING.


Then I took our toddler into town and he sat happily and quietly in the pram whilst I did some errands, without once trying to catapult himself out or reaching out to drag breakable items off the shelves.

I picked up our three year old from nursery and he actually told me what he’d been doing.  I know.  A rare occurance indeed.  He also showed me the photographs they’d had done and he’s smiling angelically on ALL of them (they must have Photo Shop-ped the horns out).

The two younger boys ate their lunch and settled for sleeps without objection and when I woke them up for the school run, they both smiled at me beautifically instead of being the crammed little wasps they usually are.

We were on the last minute and our normally contrary three year old ran all the way so we weren’t late.  Even the puppy behaved herself.

Our seven year old came out of school and told us that he’d been moved onto a higher table and I told him that I needed a special box to store my pride otherwise it was going to start dribbling out of my ears.  (Yes, I know, I made myself gag, too.)

As a result of getting lots of praise he then played a lovely game with his brothers whilst we were on our walk; they made farting noises and he pretended that the smell was knocking him out.  (OK, not the most endearing role play but they weren’t falling out, which was enough for me.)

Our eldest even kissed the three year old’s knee when he inevitably fell over and we all waved merrily at my husband as he drove past us in his van on his way home.

The boys sat cuddling whilst they watched television and I made tea and even more astounding – my husband got the vacuum cleaner out WITHOUT BEING ASKED.  I didn’t even know he knew where we kept it, never mind how to turn it on.  (He only put it on for thirty seconds to hoover up some bits of paper in his immediate vicinity that the shredder had spat out, but even so.)

Our eldest asked politely what was for tea and when I told him he said, ‘I LOVE Shepherd’s pie, mummy.  It’s my favourite.’ (I know, little creep, but I’ll take any paltry crumbs they throw me.)

I can feel something in the air now, though, as tea draws to a close and tiredness starts to creep in.  Yep, just as I thought… We’ve turned back into the Addams family 🙂




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