Bum Sniffing

It’s obviously in nature’s grand plan to make babies and young children smell good all the time so that we don’t reject them when they’re being less than delightful in other ways.

Can you imagine loving those smells on an adult?  Can you picture yourself playing the same games with your other half?

  • ‘I’m going to eat that juicy bum!’ – I don’t think so.
  • ‘Let me smell those stinky feet, pooh!’ – cue genuinely keeling over in disgust instead of just pretending to do it.
  • ‘I’m going to bite those little toes!’ – NOT…ON…YOUR….LIFE.
  • Blowing raspberries under arms – I’d rather boil my own head, thanks.

Dried breast milk or formula smells not only nice, but natural and comforting on babies yet RANK on any of your own clothes.  How?  It’s the same stuff!

And morning breath – I love my husband but I really DON’T want to kiss him when we first wake up.  Call me old fashioned, but I much prefer kissing him when he’s showered and has minty fresh breath.  I know they do it in the films, but come on, really?  Does anyone actually swap eight hours’ worth of stale spit in real life?  But with children, that first warm, sleepy kiss is the best one of the day.

FACT: Young children, and young children ONLY, have delicious breath in a morning.

Even baby poo and farts are bearable, just.  Can you say the same thing about the smells that emit from your loved one?

We don’t bat an eyelid about bending over and smelling our children’s bums IN PUBLIC to see if they’ve done anything, or if it’s just a false alarm.  Not only that, but we smell OTHER PEOPLE’S children’s bums to see if THEY’VE done anything, and act as if that’s perfectly normal.  We just walk around bum sniffing, determined to find the culprit of the offensive smell.

Just imagine THAT catching on with adults 🙂

 

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