You could say I’ve not had the best couple of days. It started yesterday morning when I put on a new, grey jumper and on seeing it, our seven year old said, ‘Why have you bought that fluffy jumper, Mum? It doesn’t suit you, you look like a gorilla. Your jeans are nice, though.’ That’s OK, then.
I then did a frantic, last minute school run in said jumper and my new winter coat that resembles a sleeping bag and as a result was sweating like a particularly sweaty pig by ten past nine.
After getting back from toddler group and nursery pick up I gave the kids their lunch and thought I’d try and put our twenty two month old on the toilet to see if he’d have a wee before his nap. What I hadn’t realised was that he’d pooed and pulling his nappy down resulted in smearing it all over his clothes, legs and feet.
When they woke up I changed the bedding on the bunk beds and almost concussed myself when I stood up by smacking my head on the upper bunk. I welded the kids’ tea to the bottom of the pan and had to pick out the black bits and then our seven year old burped in my mouth when I kissed him goodnight.
This morning I’ve swung our youngest round at toddler group and made him head butt one of my friends then sat down, crossed my legs and accidentally kicked a young boy in the head.
I had to park about three miles away from nursery and weight lift a squirming toddler because, by way of a change, we were late. Then I knocked the top of the nursery’s fish bowl into the water and probably flattened most of the marine life that they’d been carefully nurturing.
As we were putting on coats I asked our three year old what he’d done this morning and he answered, ‘I can’t tell you. My tummy is full of poo and it’s stopping me from speaking.’ To give him credit, though, it’s the most original reason I’ve heard so far for not telling me.
To top it all off the youngest two have just got up from their naps crankier than they were before, it’s raining again and the puppy has once again chewed a brand new bed. Bad times. On the plus side, I’m about to have a glass of wine and it’s my lie in tomorrow. Good times. Happy Friday everyone 🙂