Utter Madness

Why is it when it’s widely known that you should never work with children or animals that we actually CHOOSE to have both in our homes 24/7?  At least if you were working with them you’d get paid and there would be laws about how long you could spend together!! 🙂

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Children

Commando

The shame! Sent my eldest into school in his pyjamas that he slept in last night for World Book Day cos he really wanted to get up and not have to get dressed but he doesn’t wear undies in bed so he’s been commando all day!! Only realised when he was getting changed for Beavers!

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Children

Midlife Crisis

When the hell did that happen? One minute I was living for the weekends so I could go out and stay up drinking until silly o’clock and suddenly I’m excited it’s Saturday ‘cos my husband can plumb in my new washing machine and I can use it today! I’ve taken the wrapping off already so I can […]

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Women

Puppy Power

Our eldest child’s favourite past times are winding his little brother up and acting like a WWF wrestler/stuntman, we’ve got a three year old who is having breathtaking tantrums and isn’t fully potty trained and a fourteen month old who isn’t walking yet but is into everything and clingy. We thought, what’s the next logical […]

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Children

Washing Up

Our cutlery and crockery must be the cleanest for miles around ‘cos it gets a double dose.  My husband ‘washes’ it and then I get it off the draining board and put it back in the bowl, in water that is, wait for it, HOT, I scrub things with a brush instead of just dipping them […]

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Men

Growing old Ungracefully

Does anyone else feel like they’re slowly mutating instead of ageing? I wake up most mornings with another little unwelcome change or addition to my face or body and I’m getting increasingly worried about what I might be morphing into!

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Women

Domestic Bliss

I’ve finally realised the problem – I obviously have super human powers and our toys, clothes and shoes are actually invisible to the naked eye which is why only I can see them. Phew, that’s a relief, ‘cos for a second there I thought that everyone was just carelessly leaving their crap lying around for […]

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Men

Human Baby Wipe

My eldest son’s love of chocolate is truly impressive; they had a Kit Kat after tea and my three year old was covered in it so I said I’d get a wipe to which my eldest replied ‘It’s OK, I’ll lick it off his hands.’ I considered letting him for a second to save myself a job but thought […]

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Children

Beauty Dilemma

My friend has given me a sample of Clarins Flash Beauty Balm but I’m a bit nervous about using it because it says to follow IMMEDIATELY with makeup. Is ten seconds immediately? What will happen if I wait? If I put it on in the bathroom but I’ve left my makeup in the bedroom do […]

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Men

Five a Day

If my one year old chews on orange peel that he’s got out of the bin, does that still class as one of his five a day?!

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Children