Is Blogging Sadistic?

IS blogging sadistic?  This is a question I had to ask myself yesterday evening when we took the younger two to the park and the dog for a walk whilst our eldest was playing cricket.

We were having a great time, giggling on the swings, exploring the woods and frolicking in a field of knee-high grass and flowers until our four-year-old ran down the hill, laughing as he picked up momentum…and abruptly stopped as he fell face first into a patch of nettles.

As we vigorously rubbed him with dock leaves and kissed away his tears, I’m ashamed to admit that my first second thought was, ‘Well, that’s my blog for tomorrow, then.’

What a terrible mother, to use my beloved son’s misfortune in this way!  What a terrible person to examine the angry white and red welts and wish the light was better for taking photographs with my phone!  What a terrible blogger to wish I had my pad and pen with me to take notes as my pre-schooler hopped around yelping, ‘It stings, Mummy!  It stings!’

By the time I answered ‘I know it does, Sweetheart’ in my most soothing voice and picked him up to cuddle him to me, uttering reassurances that it would stop hurting soon, I’m not proud to say that I was already planning this post.

If this was an isolated incident I could maybe have put it down to the fact that Monday is strictly a ‘no wine’ zone, but I’m afraid it’s not the first time I’ve used the misfortune of others to my own blogging advantage.

When my husband cruelly (if accidentally) swept the remaining legs from beneath an innocent, unassuming three-legged dog, I couldn’t wait to share the poor animal’s trauma…after I’d stopped laughing at its expense.

I’m a monster.  A drama-seeking, blog-writing, wine-drinking monster.

In an attempt to redeem myself, though, I don’t think I blog JUST to be sadistic…I do it to be masochistic, too.

For example, when I spectacularly fell over in front of a large audience of pub patrons on a weekend away with my husband earlier this year, I could have chosen to simply put the whole sorry incident out of my mind.  We weren’t in our home town and no-one, except my husband, would have been any the wiser.

But no.  Instead I let everyone, including myself, relive every toe-curling, blush-inducing, would-rather-pull-out-my-own-fingernails-with-pliers-than-do-that-again moment.

Similarly, you may or may not have heard, but there was the debacle at yoga class a few weeks ago where my vagina chose an inopportune moment to announce its presence with a veritable fanfare of fanny farts in front of a very subdued group of bendy strangers.

When I returned home from said yoga class I blurted out what had happened to my husband, thinking he would need to know about it if we were to catch the next plane to Timbuktu.  When he could speak again he said, ‘So that’s your blog for tomorrow, then?’

At the time I stared at him in disbelief, horrified that he would even SUGGEST such a thing.  A ludicrous idea!  As if!  Not on your nelly!  And then I blogged about it the very next day.

Is there something wrong with me?  Should I REALLY feel flattered that several Twitter followers, Facebook friends and blogging networks shared this intimate moment with others?

Then again, maybe I’m not sadistic or masochistic at all; maybe I’m just finally comfortable enough in my own skin to not get embarrassed as easily as I used to.

Maybe I’ve got different priorities now and know that in the grand scheme of things, life’s too short to worry about the little things.

Or maybe I just want to make people laugh, make their day a little brighter, provide a (hopefully) enjoyable distraction for the few minutes that they read my blog.

And do you know what?  If that’s the case, I’d fail, fall and fanny fart all over again just to raise a smile 😉

Wot So Funee?

24 Comments

  1. Oh my GOd, are you always this entertaining? This is only the second post of yours that I’ve read… and again it has made me lol. Thank you.

  2. hahaha I must be sadistic too….My kids do something naughty or hurt themselves and I think that will make a great blog post too….lol

  3. We’re very grateful to you for putting our needs first… Truly selfless 🙂 I have to admit I am guilty of taking the photo first too…! Great post.

  4. Guilty as charged your honour! I regularly hear the Tween saying “please don’t put that on Facebook” when I’ve already thought up a brilliantly funny status to go with it….I do question whether that’s fair or not. However, as you say, I’m also prepared to make myself look like a total loon in the process so at least in that way it’s fair!

    • Absolutely. I think it’s fine to laugh at your children if you can laugh at yourself, too. They’re SO going to get us back for it in the future, though, aren’t they? I put a photo of my eldest having a ‘tantrum’ on Twitter and he still hasn’t forgiven me. He’s probably planning his revenge as we speak!

  5. This is only the second post of yours that I’ve read… both had had me in stitches. Keep on writing about all those little nuances please! Emma

  6. This is only the second post of yours I’ve ever read. Equally as funny, both have made me laugh out loud. Not that easy for me to do. Thanks!

  7. awww bless him, my son had his first encounter with stinging nettles on his leg at the eekend (he is almost 4) not nice. however, as you say every incident in life is a possible blogging opportunity lol x

  8. Oh I have been giggling like anything over this………. you’ve set me up for a right good day. Oh – I often think “That’s one for the blog!” Fab post xx

  9. I think the older you get the less shame you have. I also think the more you blog the fewer morals you have. You keep the important ones, obviously, but being able to laugh at yourself is a huge life skill you’re teaching your kids. I think…

    • Definitely, couldn’t agree more. Do I keep the important morals?… Erm, I mean, yes, of course I do (unless breaking them would make a good blog post). Arrggghh, I’ve got to stop! xx

  10. This made me laugh! I’ve only been blogging for a couple of months and I’ve been wondering this myself – I have to stop myself egging them on when they are being naughty for the sole purpose of a funny blog post!

    • I know, awful isn’t it? You can’t help feeling pleased that amongst the minor catastrophes there’s some ammunition to blog about. It’s a difficult habit to break! Thanks for reading x

  11. So funny. And yes I think it’s hard not to view everything as a blog post once you start blogging! Maybe I could write a blog post about commenting on your blog post? lol xx

  12. Thank you. It definitely gets that way. Hmm, could I put a humorous spin on bleaching my moustache? You just can’t help it once you start! 😉 xx

  13. This is SO true! It used to be everything turned into a Facebook status, now its “could this be a blog entry?”. I have to admit the day my 12 year old niece decided to give my five month old a shoulder carry only for him to puke on her head I did immediately say “status update” to her 13 year old sister. Apparently this caused a bit of a sibling “incident” later on… Bad auntie Lol!!

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